Premarital Counseling: Is it Right For You?

Is premarital counseling really worth the time, money and effort? Absolutely! While couples are often reluctant to attend premarital counseling prior to their wedding, it can be a proactive way of preparing for the changes that marriage brings. Learn how premarital counseling can help break down potential issues before they become unmanageable and discover tips on getting started.

What is Premarital Counseling?

Premarital counseling is a form of therapy that is meant to create a strong foundation for couples as they prepare for marriage. It's designed to help couples identify issues, obstacles, and potential conflict areas in their relationship, as well as discussing topics such as communication styles, money management, body language, and long-term expectations. The goal of premarital counseling is to create an open line of communication between the couple and hone their ability to compromise while growing in their relationship.

Am I Ready for Counseling?

 
Before starting premarital counseling, it is important to ask yourself some questions. Are you really committed to your partner and willing to do what it takes for the relationship? Do you have an open mind, be willing to change, and be prepared to work on areas of conflict? Do both of you feel comfortable talking about any issues or sensitive topics that are brought up in the counselling sessions? Finally, are you and your partner looking at the long-term goals of marriage and how premarital counselling can contribute towards achieving these goals?

What to Expect in Premarital Counseling

 
In premarital counseling, couples can expect to discuss several important topics, such as identifying and managing conflict in a constructive way. They should also discuss communication issues, financial responsibilities, and expectations of one another in the marriage. Aside from these topics, some counselors also provide practical tools and exercises to help couples enhance their relationship. Premarital counseling can also be an opportunity for a couple to develop their shared values, beliefs and goals for the marriage. Additionally, couples may benefit from exploring cultural differences or religious beliefs that have caused conflicts in the past.

Gaining Mutual Understanding Through Learning about Each Other

 
Premarital counseling can be a great opportunity to better understand each other, and learn and appreciate differences in individual personalities. Couples may also gain a better understanding of one another’s family backgrounds, values and beliefs, as well as provide an opportunity for productive dialogue about where you both stand on important life issues. This kind of discourse will help couples be aware of their differences, but also focus on their similarities and shared goals for the marriage.

Address Areas of Conflict Beforehand

Premarital counseling can provide a safe space to talk about any areas of conflict between the two of you, such as differences in parenting styles, expectations for division of house chores, money management and other important lifestyle choices. Taking the time to work through these topics at this point can be an invaluable resource down the line when life inevitably throws couples curveballs. Counseling will give both of you a set of tools to handle potential disagreements that could otherwise lead to strained relationships.